The older man: he’s confident, sexy and knows how to navigate his way around the boardroom and the bedroom. But how old is too old?
Stability! Fabulous sex! Chivalry is back! Hooray! Dating an older bloke has its merits. He treats you like a princess, opens the car door for you, carries your handbag, chooses the wine and pays for your dinner.
Whether the age gap is two years or twenty, many girls agree: older blokes are the way to go. (Just ask Hollywood’s most notorious younger girls Catherine Zeta Jones and Calista Flockhart.) But are these blokes really all they’re cracked up to be?
“A man’s power and security comes with age,” laments Suzie Engles, a successful twentysomething lawyer who doesn’t date blokes her own age. “They are already established so they don’t get intimidated by my success. Unlike younger men, they don’t mind if I work long hours because they understand the dedication. Oh, and they’ve got none of those weird issues that the younger boys seem to have.”
Ever since the courtship between movie stars Humphrey Bogart, 45, and Lauren Bacall, 20, back in the 1945, we’ve long been ascinated by age-gap relationships. Why do they work? What makes them tick? And…shouldn’t she be dating someone closer to her own age?
“I’d rather be with someone who looks after me well instead of an immature player-type,” says 23- year-old Lynne Rose who is currently dating a 48-year-old banker. “It’s a completely different experience. He understands the word ‘chivalry’; he opens the door, looks after me and is a complete gentleman.” And by the looks of him, he’s definitely not an old geezer. (At least not yet!)
“Besides,” adds Suzie, “the older man often comes complete with a place to live, a stable career and a fine wine collection!”
But while everything seems smooth sailing for the younger girls, the blokes don’t seem as thrilled.
“I always find myself having to carry the conversation between us,” says Matthew H., a 40-year-old television producer who regularly dates younger girls. “And another thing I find is that younger girls are extremely disorganised. They can never ever keep to arrangements. If something else comes along, they reschedule and re-arrange, even at the last minute because, hey, they’ll just see me the next night. But what they don’t understand is that I work; my time is extremely limited.”
Overhearing our converation, Matthew’s cameraman suddenly pipes up: “I’ve been on both sides of the coin and I agree; younger girls can be very immature. Now I’m dating a girl four years older than me, and it’s a whole different story!”
But back to the older blokes. Author Ron R. Steele, a seasoned “older man”, found that his over-35 mates were having a tough time nabbing the younger girl. So in lure of providing them with a few tips, he penned the tome How to Date Younger Women: For Men Over 35.
Aside from Steele’s various rules like “don’t be too possessive and jealous”, “be funny, light- hearted, silly, and laugh a lot” and “don’t choose the beauty queen”, I’ll leave you with his key piece of advice: “Get slim and trim. Young single women are not attracted to balding men with a potbelly.”
Indeed. Oh, and you might want to ditch the theatre for a club every now and then, just to keep things interesting.